Why Are We So Adept at Practicing Avoidance?

I have a theory about the practice of avoidance - when you're assiduously avoiding doing something, it's probably because you don't want to do it. Pretty obvious, right? Who feels like filing a stack of documents, cleaning up the dishes, clearing out the garage, making those five phone calls you promised to make seeking donations for your favorite charity?

But let's look a little bit deeper at what comes up with avoidance. Is it guilt, shame, anger at whoever's putting pressure on you? Often, avoidance creates a mix of emotions, none of which feel pleasant. Quite often, you know that just executing the task will result in relief, so what's the payoff in torturing yourself?

Avoidance is often a symptom that covers fear, anger, or perfectionism, or again, all of these plus others I haven't identified. Sometimes, we're awash in confusing emotions, which deepen the urge to avoid. There's fear of saying or doing the wrong thing, or not doing it well enough. Anger at being told what to do by someone else - or knowing that someone else should be doing whatever it is you're avoiding. And perfectionism is about all of these things - the fear of failure is so pervasive - that sense of not being good enough.

What if you could imagine that everything you do is good enough, at least for this moment? Would you still be practicing avoidance?